Happy Mother's Day--Things to do with Spinach Fettuccine

A Meat-lover's Meal

• Put 1 pound of 95% lean beef into a 12 quart pot
• Cook on medium heat, stirring occasionally
• Drain off any excess fat (if possible)
• Add: 2 tablespoons extra light olive oil, 2 large sweet onions (chopped) 2 medium zucchini (chopped)
• Cook until tender
• Add: 2 heaping tablespoons minced garlic
• Cook for about 10 minutes on med-low heat
• Add: 5 medium Roma tomatoes (chopped) and approximately 2 cups chopped fresh mushrooms
• Add 1 6oz. can tomato paste and 1 large can of tomato sauce
• Bring to low boil, stirring occasionally
• Lower heat to simmer
• Simmer for about 20 minutes
• While this is simmering, cook the fettuccine
• Serve with a smile

A Vegetarian Meal

(This is quick and easy to make!)

• Cook the spinach fettuccine as directed on the package
• Into a large frying pan, put 2 tablespoons extra-light olive oil and 3 tablespoons minced garlic 
• Cook on med-low heat for about five minutes
• Add: 2 cups chopped mushrooms and 4 cups baby spinach
• Cook for about 5 minutes, until all is tender and hot
• Serve with a grin

A Flying Fettuccine Monster 

(Cousin to the Flying Spaghetti Monster)

(NOT TO BE EATEN!) 

Delicious Iconography: The Flying Spaghetti Monster

• Cook a bag of spinach fettuccine 
• Let cool
• Dip noodles, one at a time, into a mixture of 1/2 water and 1/2 white (Elmer's) glue
• On wax paper, shape the dipped noodles into the shape of your monster.
• Let dry completely
• Make another batch of 1/2 glue 1/2 water and paint the entire monster
• Let dry
• Flip monster over and paint the back
• Let dry
• Flip monster over and paint the front again
• Let dry
• Flip monster over and paint the back again
• Let dry
• Flip monster over and paint the front for the third and final time
• Let dry
• Flip monster over and paint the back for the third and final time
• Let dry and harden completely (as much as it will--it will be rather rubbery)
• With 100% glue, add other items (such as plastic eyes, pipe cleaners,...) to add characteristics to your monster.